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Ahead of Father's Day this Sunday, 21 June, we talk to HR’s most senior leaders on how they combine the most important job of all – fatherhood with leading people teams.
There is a particular irony in shaping an organisation's culture and policies around working parents while quietly wondering how you will balance the dynamic of family life yourself. It is a tension several senior HR leaders admit to candidly this Father's Day, as they reflect on the gap between what good practice looks like on paper and what it actually feels like to live it.
Andy Moat, People Director, B&Q - "No one is too important to miss the moments that matter"
Andy Moat
People Director, B&Q
Andy Moat, People Director at B&Q, wrote his reflections from a train into London on the morning his 15-year-old daughter sat her final GCSE. "Where has the time gone?" he asks, before setting out the philosophy that has guided his approach to being a father throughout a senior HR career - no regrets.. He recalls a CEO who once told him he had watched all of his children's school plays back on video because he couldn't be there in person. "That stuck with me," Moat says. "I think it's a false choice. No one is too important at work not to be able to prioritise key family moments."
That belief was tested directly when Moat separated from his partner while his three children were young, making him a single parent during the periods they stayed with him. "I found it infuriating when male colleagues would comment on me arriving later to work than usual, having done the school run," he says.
I found it infuriating when male colleagues would comment on me arriving later to work than usual, having done the school run
The experience gave him a window into something his female colleagues had likely been navigating for years. It also hardened his resolve. "It made me more determined than ever to be there when my children needed me and manage the juggle. I'm told more junior colleagues noticed, and it encouraged them to do the same."
On leave itself, Moat is reflective rather than defensive. He took two weeks with each of his children, which he describes as special, but admits with hindsight that more time would have helped him and his partner achieve a fairer balance while she was also juggling her career. "I think it's a fair shout for parents to balance that time a bit more than typical gender stereotypes, especially when both are working."
Matt Stripe, Chief People Officer, Lipton Teas - "There is no universal blueprint"
Matt Stripe
Chief People Officer, Lipton Teas
Matt Stripe, Chief People Officer at Lipton Teas, takes a similarly grounded view, though his path looked different. "There is no greater joy than becoming a parent," he says, "And I feel incredibly fortunate to have been able to build a fulfilling career as a Chief People Officer while also watching my daughter grow up." For Stripe, the absence of a single formula is the point. "I don't believe there is one. For me, it has always come down to priorities. Children don't remember every meeting you attended or every milestone you achieved. They remember whether you were there."
Notably, Stripe never took parental leave himself - a detail that sits at the heart of the UK's current paternity leave debate. Just 63% of fathers take statutory leave, compared with 84% of mothers, and fathers who skip it are more than three times as likely as mothers to say the reason is that they couldn't afford to. Stripe is candid about leaning on a strong domestic partnership instead.
For me, it has always come down to priorities. Children don't remember every meeting you attended or every milestone you achieved. They remember whether you were there
"I've been fortunate to have a wife who has supported me throughout my career and been an exceptional mother to our daughter," he says, while stressing there is no universal blueprint: "What I've learned is that successful families, like successful teams, are built on partnership, open communication and a shared commitment to supporting one another."
