How to negotiate for career and business success

Whether you realise it or not, you’re already an experienced negotiator.

Every interaction you have with another person is a negotiation to some extent. Whether it’s trying to decide which film to see with a mate or where to go on holiday with your partner, it’s all about bargaining to get what you want or at least something that you’re happy with.

Negotiation is especially important at work. Whatever it is you do, your career will be shaped by the strength of your negotiating skills. A good negotiator will be better equipped to develop useful alliances, secure promotions and perform better in day-to-day tasks.

If you can improve your negotiating skills, you will do better in your career and your organisation will benefit too. Here are 5 of the most common negotiating styles that I observe and their impact.

The cheetah

This big cat is competitive and fights to win. She wants her opponent to lose at all costs. This can be a costly process and requires focus, energy and resources.

The shark

The shark uses power, control and authority to win the negotiation and force defeat upon his opponent. He engages in power plays and is determined to fight until only he is victorious.

The turtle

The turtle avoids the tough talks. She avoids the negotiation and does not assert her needs confidently, maybe because she is unsure of her needs or is unsure about how to express them.

The puppy

The puppy is eager to please and is accommodating. He wants the other person to succeed and wants to feel loved. The puppy will give up a lot to obtain a sense of security and safety.

The owl

The owl believes in co-operation. She observes closely and listens attentively. She recognises the need to secure an outcome that meets her own needs but also takes into account the needs of the other person.

So what does effective negotiation look like and how should you do it? Well, it goes without saying that the owl tends to make the best negotiator. Here is what an owl would do:

1. The Owl focusses on the areas that are COMMON to all parties

To do this both parties need to listen carefully and calmly to what the other person is saying. The owl will explore the other person’s feelings, their needs and their ultimate goals. Owls articulate their feelings, needs and goals clearly also. Owls will look for convergence and the areas of mutual benefit. Owls listen to understand, not to blame. This technique promotes a meeting of minds and allows each side to see how shared needs can be met.

2. Embrace DIFFERENCE to build trust

Owls recognise that focussing on where parties differ leads to greater awareness, empathy and understanding on all sides. The skilled negotiator understand the value of divergence and is able to use that skill to build rapport and recognition. By being comfortable with difference, owls can build trust. That trust can move mountains during a negotiation.

The most productive negotiations take place when those involved move out of the conflict zone and into what is known as the Zone of Possible Agreement or ZOPA. Once you get into this zone, when an agreement is reached, all parties will be content with the outcome and you have a better chance of securing your own success and success for your business also.