Want to change workplace behavior? Try shifting from calling out to 'call-in conversations'

Imagine for a moment sitting in a meeting or conference virtually or in person and a colleague or facilitator makes an offensive, race- or gender-based comment in the spirit of telling a joke.

Would you let it go or say something? Would you say something in the moment or wait?

Or, imagine you are asked to speak to an employee about their hygiene, disruptive behavior, or poor performance.  As an HR professional, these conversations can be challenging if you are not prepared or trained in how to handle them.

Over my 29-year HR career, I have gotten comfortable having uncomfortable conversations because I recognize that doing so creates the best opportunity to impact change and improve organizational culture.

But what is the best approach? At the end of the day the goal is to bring unacceptable behavior or conduct to the individual’s attention while simultaneously preserving their dignity. And that is the hard part.

What are ‘call-in conversations’?

Calling people out can be confrontational and put them on the defensive. Instead, another approach is to call someone “in” to a conversation. Calling in is for the purpose of creating awareness, providing another perspective, or for a learning opportunity. Most times, people are clueless that they even offended anyone.

On October 8, 2019, I attended a legal update HR conference, which is the same year the CROWN Act (Create a Respectful and Open World for Natural Hair) was passed.  The law prohibits race-based hair discrimination. Specifically, it covers the denial of employment and educational opportunities because of hair texture or protective hairstyles including braids, locs, twists or bantu knots.

The attorney who facilitated the workshop gave a professional update on 2019 labor and employment laws and those effective in 2020. However, when he mentioned the CROWN Act, he proceeded to make fun of it and transformed his presentation into a comedy improv. His performance had the crowd erupting in laughter. He admitted to not understanding the law and thought it meant that one could not wear green hair to work.

I was in disbelief since I had a full head of braids in an audience that was predominantly White. The CROWN Act gave me the confidence to try this protective hairstyle in the workplace for the first time in my mid-50’s. I started my career at a time where Black women were conditioned to straighten their hair to fit into Corporate America.  I quickly gathered my belongings and left the workshop 45 minutes early to race back to my office. I knew I needed to deal with it and was unsure of whether I should contact him directly or just let it go.

As the day progressed, the latter was not an option since I was so upset. I wrote the attorney a heartfelt email to describe my experience and explain why this law was important to Black, Indigenous, and people of color (BIPOC) communities. My hope was that he would respond so we could have a phone conversation. Instead, he ghosted me. Weeks went by without a response.

By December, I forwarded the email I sent to him to a senior-level partner in the law firm, who I knew personally. As it turned out, she was his supervisor.  She was appalled by my experience and assured me she would handle it. And while I would have preferred to have spoken with him directly, I felt it important to call him in albeit through a third party.

A healthy organizational culture is one that creates a safe space for employees to work through conflict

Tips for conducting call-in conversations

Let’s circle back to a workplace example. In a situation where a colleague makes an offensive, off-color joke or you must address a performance issue, here are some tips to share with your leaders, managers, and employees on how to conduct the call-in conversation without it being confrontational:

1. Contact your colleague or employee and invite them to a meeting either virtually or in person.
2. Open the meeting by stating that the meeting is to discuss the offensive comment or performance issue.
3. Be specific when describing the matter. For example, “In the meeting yesterday, you made a joke about race, and I wanted you to know how that made me feel.” Explain your feelings and why it was offensive.
4. Give your colleague an opportunity to respond without interruption. A natural response might be, “That was not my intention.” That response is an easy out. Proceed to broaden the conversation so that the individual accepts accountability. And if not accountability, at least an understanding of the impact of their actions.
5. Conclude by reaching understanding, setting boundaries, and then agreeing on how to engage with one another moving forward. Sometimes, that means to agree to disagree.

This type of openness takes courage and it’s risky because you still want to remain professional colleagues. You may not meet each other for drinks after work, but at least you can respect each other at work.

A healthy organizational culture is one that creates a safe space for employees to work through conflict. When this type of behavior goes unaddressed it is the same as giving permission. Positive employee experiences depend on listening, learning, and understanding different perspectives, which is why the values of access, belonging, inclusion, diversity, and equity (ABIDE) must be embedded into the fabric of the organization. Culture shifts happen with one call-in conversation at a time.

Lisa M. Sánchez is the vice president for Employee Experience and Engagement (HR) at ArtCenter College of Design. She leads a team dedicated to enriching the experiences and engagements for faculty and staff. Critical to this work is her direct work in ABIDE (access, belonging, inclusion, diversity, and equity) and organizational culture. With this bandwidth of experience, Sánchez has served on numerous panels on ABIDE, organizational culture, the future of work as it relates to managing and leading during a pandemic as well as post-pandemic strategies.